My Quest For A Spanking Playmate

This blog continues to attract this search query, and by inference, people who are themselves hoping to find the right person, in the right place, who wants to spank them, or be spanked by them. My previous posts on this subject, Is Online Behaviour Important, and Seeking Spanking Partners are read daily, and when I have not posted recently, their popularity floats them to the top of the ‘most read posts’ list. Nobody ever replies or comments, and so it is unclear to me whether those previous posts are any use, or not. Did you – do you – find the ideas helpful?

My own search has been unsuccessful thus far, in that I have not yet met a girl who is inclined to tip herself face down across my lap. Or, at least, not one for whom this inclination is a practical possibility! (Yes girls, I know, damn that pond!) But I am getting to know some fascinating people along the way.


But I am reminding myself that human relationships are categorically not like shopping! Despite my ‘market stall’ analogy, which is intended to help folks on the way to doing the basics right, we do not wander into a bar, select our chosen ‘other’ and haul them off to do rude things with them… Although! …. Hmm, nice idea but it has flaws 

Let’s have a show of hands here. How many of us have lusted after someone from afar, dreamed of their perfection in our sleep, schemed and maneuvered to get close to them, and possibly even made total asses of ourselves in futile attempts to get them to notice us? And then one day, by pure chance, we have an entire day with them to ourselves, only to find that they are unbearable and by lunchtime we can’t wait to escape them. Or maybe that chance never came, and we still dream about them? Well, stop it! Because if that person was right for us, mutual attraction would have overcome everything to bring us together. And then we would have been disappointed anyway.

Something has caught her eye…

Physical attraction (or lack thereof!) cannot be ignored, but it can easily be overcome. A person’s writing is a window into the workings of their mind, and the greater the depth and detail of the writing, the less opaque the window. If, when composing one’s personal ad, we simply copy the same tired formula used by hundreds of thousands before us, we may as well use a fake stick-on window, or at best a mark-out for where the window is going to be. Many are afraid to allow people to peer into their minds, lest what others see in there makes them run away. But isn’t that going to happen sooner or later anyway? It is unreasonable to expect everyone to like our decor, but compatible people certainly will. How many bland, repetitive windows have we passed without even noticing the contents? It is the ‘interesting’ windows that catch our eye, and it doesn’t matter if it is Macey’s store front, or the tatty little junk shop on the corner, we will stop at both (and I will be found gazing into the junk shop long after it shuts).

“But I can’t write!” I hear you say. Cow dung. ‘Can’t be arsed to write’ is more likely closer to the truth. Certainly some people are ‘more gifted’ (code for ‘find it easier’) in the writing department, but their (my?) prose may be a massive turn-off to some people, whereas the naive  simplicity of what you write might be a beautiful thing to others.

What is a turn-on to me, every time, is a piece of writing that has been written from the heart. It really doesn’t matter that it may be technically incompetent (and I make no inflated claims for my own efforts here!), or incorrectly spelled, or badly punctuated. What matters is that you have laid out a piece of you on the page. ‘This is me, this is what I think, this is how I feel, take it or leave it’. The person who is right for you will choose to ‘take it’, every time.

So please, when you next spare five minutes to post your personal ad. Stop. Forget about telling us all which part of your anatomy is bigger than everyone else’s (it only tells us which part is smaller!). Forget about telling us how many times and for how long. Forget about telling us how you can breathe through your ears (Girls! Focus!!). Use that five minutes to figure out what makes you different from the herd, what makes you special (the herd all have tits and cocks), and then take five hours to write a few careful lines. That is the ad that will actually attract someone. 

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