One of the top search queries that brings readers to this blog is “seeking spanking partners”. Not entirely unreasonable given that I began the blog with the intention of finding a spanking playmate for myself, and I have already made a post that focuses on what many people do wrong in their own attempt to find a partner. (Is Online Behaviour Important?
The biggest single frustration of looking for a partner is that there is no real sign of progress. Each day you eagerly check your email Inbox in the hope that someone has contacted you, or replied to an attempted contact that you made the previous day, but in vain. As the days, weeks and possibly months tick by, despair sets in. Are all those opposite sex profiles just fakes and time-wasters? Are you doing something wrong?
Is there something objectionable about you that is putting people off?
The answers to all those questions is most probably a resounding ‘No!’. That is not to say that everyone is genuine and honest, or that a few people are not just amusing themselves with no real intention of progressing beyond online teasing. Or that you are doing everything perfectly, because the one certainty is that what works for one person will not be 100% right for the next. But overall, it is the ultimate game of patience.
As I know from first-hand experience, and am currently experiencing for myself, natural doubts come and go. An occasional positive contact from someone across the globe (bless you xmemore!) goes a long way to bolster confidence. If she was attracted, then surely it is just a matter of time before someone closer shows up? True, but the great unknown is how long that period of time will be – and stop calling me Shirley!
It is important that you set your stall out.
Just as any market trader knows, your goods need to look purchaseable (I deliberately avoided using the word ‘attractive’ because this tends to indicate Hollywood looks etc), your stall must not be seen to be attempting to hide anything, although any trader will know to put the very best produce to the fore. People out there are realistic, they are imperfect specimens themselves and do not seriously expect perfection. And they are certainly just as frustrated themselves. Have you ever tried to buy a specific item, only to find that nobody is selling the right model, in the right colour, and at the right price? The truth is that your item will be on sale, somewhere, sometime. You, the seeker, must be patient.
Have you set your stall out in the market square, or is it tucked away in a back street that nobody walks? In other words, you will have placed a personal ad that explains who you are and who you hope to meet, but is it placed on a high traffic site, and is the site clientelle that right type?
The Internet is a fantastic resource for connecting with other people, the more so if we are involved in something a little risqué that we would rather our mothers and the next door neighbour didn’t know about. This blog is my personal ad, I guess. I hate trying to write descriptions of myself, preferring to waffle away, and in doing so exposing my inner workings for all to see. But how many people are passing by? If my chances are 1 in 10,000, then I need 10,000 visitors, or maybe I will strike lucky and the 64th visitor will be the one. I am hoping to improve the odds by publicising my blog. And I have a profile on Facebook that publishes blog snippets and a link back to the full article. I am connecting with other spanking blogs so there is a pathway for people to follow. And I am befriending people on Facebook.
I am not saying that my way is the right way! But essentially, if you follow the market trader logic and set out your goods neatly, using whichever means you prefer, then passing people will browse your stall, and perhaps one will make a purchase.
Sticking with the market trader analogy for a moment, are you attracted when they start touting their wares in full voice, or does it annoy you, preferring to browse at your leisure and in your own time? And what of the traders who single you out from the passing crowd for a direct and personal approach? The latter equates to harvesting names and email addresses from forums and such like, and then bombarding them all with your approach. It can work, but my belief is that it annoys most, and may well get you barred from the market place altogether!
Be keen by all means, but don’t let eagerness destroy your chances. Good luck!