As I touched on in earlier posts, in my experience there is a dual aspect to erotic spanking between consenting adults. For both spanker and spankee, the purely physical act satisfies our deepest innate needs. Scientific research has demonstrated anatomical reactions to receiving a spanking, chemical changes rushing from nerve centres to affect parts of the brain, in a good way. Endorphins, that is. But I do not intend to delve too deeply here, it is enough to understand that either giving or receiving a spanking is a tremendously cathartic experience, presuming that it is carried out sensitively. The physical act is the core to all that surrounds the experience.
But I do not believe the true eroticism of the act is apparent in the purely physical.
Just as with straight-forward sex, it takes our brains to get in on the act before we begin to enjoy the physical in a deep and emotional way. Whether giving or receiving, our minds absorb the physical sensations and incorporate them into our thoughts and fantasies. Consciously or not, we are each taken to a place within ourselves where an inner roleplay is enacted. At least, in my own experience it is highly unusual to remain strictly in the ‘here and now’, purely focussed on the action within the room. This should not be confused with the notorious accusation that we are sometimes engaged in sex with our partners but fantasizing that they are a movie star. It is more that we are (at least subconsciously) being guided by our fantasies which probably do not revolve around a specific person, rather they are a jumbled cloud of erotic snippets that have accumulated over the years.
In my experience, a spanking partnership functions at its very best when your playmate’s deepest and darkest fantasies and desires are a close match with your own.
This is often quite difficult to establish, since relative strangers are very unlikely to blurt out their kinkiest, most personal fantasies at first meeting. But over time, as the relationship flourishes and matures, the partners become more confident in each other and slowly reveal snippets of the things most personal to them. It could turn out that one partner reveals a fantasy involving X, while the other partner has always tried to suppress the same fantasy, considering it too deep and too dark to cope with. This being the case, they have the opportunity to explore a whole new avenue together, very intimate, and very personal. Such liaisons are capable of producing an incredible intimacy that is much more intense than even the longest serving married couples ever achieve.
Sharing Your Toys – Open Up
With each new partner – and partnerships such as those described above do not come along very often – there is the added eroticism of exploring another person’s mental furniture and playing with their ‘toys’ for a while. Not to mention having someone to share your toys with.
